Sometimes You Win. Sometimes You Lose.

“If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment.”

∼Henry David Thoreau

Hi friends! Today’s post is a departure from my usual focus on Scotland. Instead, I want to write about my trip to Florida with my sister this past week. So with that said…

Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. For me and my dear, long-distance sister S, this past week was a bit of a loss.

S and I started going on “adventures” several years ago. They are not really adventures in the truest sense of the word, they’re really just sister get-a-ways. But that’s what we call them. Our adventures have taken us to the coast of South Carolina, the mountains of Tennessee, to destinations in the Great Appalachian Valley, and this past week, to the Gulf Coast of Florida.

White sandy beach dune and blue water.

For months we had anticipated our beautiful Emerald Coast vacation. The area is a favorite spot for me and Mr. C and I was so excited to share it with my sister who had never been to Florida. I purchased our flights, reserved our rental car, and booked a stay in a cute townhome that Mr. C and I had rented in the past. Everything was all set. We were excited and anxious for our week of sisterly seaside bliss.

White sandy beach dunes and low growing shrubbery.
White sandy beach at sunset.

We had no idea the disappointment that lay ahead.

Instead of enjoying the soothing sounds of surf and seabirds, we ended up being treated to a solid week of a gutting/renovation project of the townhome next door. To be fair, the property owner did tell me about the construction. However, the foreman had assured her that they had finished with the noisy stuff. They lied. Every single day from 7:45 am until 5:30 pm…WHACK, BANG, WHIR, SAW, HUM, BUZZ, SLAM!! Because the two homes are attached, there were moments our apartment actually shook from the brute force of the men at work. We couldn’t spend time on our decks during the day or even leave our slider open because the cacophony of the construction was so intrusive. I have never in my life been so stressed on vacation or ready to go home early! We notified our landlord, of course, and she sincerely apologized and kindly offered a discount to help ease the pain. She was every bit as frustrated as we were. I wanted to be an adult about it because sometimes you-know-what just happens and there’s not a damn thing you can do but try to make the best of it. And I totally get that it’s insignificant in the grand scheme of things. The world has much bigger problems than our vacation woes. But I was angry at the situation nonetheless. As I write this, I’m still angry.

My bond with S was born out of a rather catastrophic experience. Eight years ago, while visiting me for the first time (and on her first vacation in years), she suffered a terrible fall that landed her flat on her back between my car and the curb. Within half an hour, we were in the E.R., and by 8 am the following morning, she was in surgery for a devastating pilon fracture of her tibia. S spent the next few days in the hospital in a hometown, not her own and in a state of grogginess from the hardcore pain medication. Even today, she cannot remember key details of the experience that I have related to her.

Disappointment, sadness, stress, and fear were just some of the emotions that we both faced in the days after. First, of course, the utter disappointment of interrupted plans and the sadness of seeing her in such agony. I stressed about how I would care for her in my wheelchair unequipped home, and she worried about her loss of independence. We feared not knowing how quickly she would heal and how she was going to be able to continue to work to pay her bills and how she would care for her two small children. I wasn’t even sure how Mr. C and I were going to get her home. There were more than a few tears shed during that time.

S ended up staying with us for two full weeks before we were able to return her home to her children. It was a long two weeks, and by all accounts, it was a terrible time. Except that strangely, it wasn’t. Because two sisters who were really more like friendly, long-distance acquaintances, bonded. It sounds cheesy, but that experience gave us a whole new love and appreciation for each other. We started as sisters, and we ended up as friends.

Life is pretty unpredictable, as I know, you know. Sometimes you outright get the lemonade, and sometimes you just get the lemons. Twice now together, S and I have been given lemons. When I think back over the last eight years with her, though, from the time of her injury until our goodbye hug yesterday morning, the lemons aren’t really the memories that stand out to me. It’s the laughter. The laugh-til-you-cry almost wet your pants kind. It’s the way we can be stupid and silly with each other – completely ourselves. It’s the times we have shared a prayer. It’s the way she teases me for my vacation “low points” and for frequently “pulling a Wendy” (yeah, I do funny stuff sometimes). It’s that time I asked her to stop humming because she was getting on my nerves (she’ll never let me live that one down!). It’s the way we both cry every time we have to say goodbye. It’s a hundred little moments that, when added up, make for one big happy memory.

Hm, perhaps in our disappointment, we didn’t lose so much this past week after all.


14 thoughts on “Sometimes You Win. Sometimes You Lose.

  • Sorry to hear the get-away was spoiled by construction but you were still together and that’s what counts. I’m sure you were able to escape to the beach with a picnic and a book. At least the noise didn’t keep you up at night. That would have been awful. Holidays don’t always turn out as planned. xo

    • Thank you, Darlene. We did have a good time together despite the noise. Always lots of laughs and silliness when we’re together. And you are right, at least we had quiet nights! I told her we would try going back to Florida again one of these days. Maybe next time, though, we’ll choose a house instead of an apartment. πŸ™‚

  • Love this !! It sounds just like me and my little sister Jan. We have gone on adventures together for the past 30 yrs. And yes this is what we call all our trips together ADVENTURES. Made lots of memories and had a lot of laughs remembering those trips.
    But we have always been best friends.
    Continue on with your Adventures , I promise you will love then.
    Judy Bailey

    • Thank you so much for your comment! I love that you call them adventures too. It’s wonderful that you two have always been so close. I’m really blessed that my sister and I have ‘rediscovered’ each other in our adult years. I hope we’ll have many more adventures to come. πŸ™‚

  • You are so lucky to have her! I don’t have a sister and often feel lonesome. I rely on my daughter for company. Fortunately, we get on well and really love each other. Soon, I hope the both of us will be getting away too on holidays.

    Sorry about your vacation not being what you wanted it to be. I know about that type of holiday. We went away once and they had no water! It was so cold and we had to lug water from the pool! πŸ™‚

    • Oh my goodness, having to lug water is terrible! That’s even worse than our construction! πŸ™‚ I wish you and your daughter a great vacation when you do go. πŸ™‚

  • Yes, sisters are special! So sorry you have been given two “lemons”, but toast with the “lemonade” every chance you get. My sister and I have had similar experiences and we talk about them all the time. Nice post!

  • Wendy, I’m so sorry about your disturbed vacation! I feel your pain. You can’t get that time for relaxation back. Our lives are so stressful with noise, too much light, and various other sources of overstimulation, when we set aside time for quiet, we so desperately need it!

    Of course it’s not like Notre Dame or Windsor Castle burning, or the multitude of human tragedies to choose from, but it’s YOUR pain, and at the time, it fills you up. I get it! And it makes me mad too when it happens to me!

    • Thanks, Cristine. I appreciate your sympathy. I was afraid I was just being whiny but I was really mad! lol. What I chose to leave out is that I also had to go to urgent care at the beginning of the trip for an ear infection. And then on the day we departed, my sister couldn’t get home due to storms in Dallas. She was supposed to depart Panama City at 7 am and be home by noon. Instead, she got home at 1:30 the next morning! We’ll have stories to tell about this trip forever! πŸ˜€

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